You are not alone.
I have been in the premium wine and spirits business for many years and have experienced the reenactment of this ritual over and over, several times a day. Shopping for yourself is easy. First, you look for your price range, and then note the familiarity of certain varietals. Now you choose the prettiest label, or close your eyes and grab.
When it comes to pleasing someone else with your selection, you enter a state of fear, of failure to make the right choice and, thereby, to please. There is a feeling of frustration, maybe anger at not having taken the time and effort of learning the language of wine.
Don’t beat yourself up over this; you are not about to intellectualize over the subject and, frankly, find it a bother.
So, you set about finding the nicest wine selection in your neighborhood and the wine expert that won’t make you feel like a fool. Not to worry. Most lovers of the grape in its fermented form are predisposed to share their knowledge with you. They expend a big chunk of their lives reading voraciously about their subject. Additional hours are devoted daily to sampling the many bottles that come their way, as personnel from wineries, distributors, importers and brokers vie for valuable shelf space. Ultimately, they make their choices based on the pleasures of the palate, or, they cheat a little and buy wine that has received high ratings or medals. Most wines have not been reviewed, so the shop owner now stamps the selection with his or her own personality.
Having found that shop that makes you feel comfortable about your purchases, let the owner or sales personnel get to know you better; at least, your tastes and needs. Then, you will have curtailed that vexing fear of wine.